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PLEASEPLASEPLEASE MY MOTHER I DONT KNOW WHATS HAPPENING. i thik she might be mentally abousing me but Im not sure.... she ruins all my interests and gaslight me very often, even blaming me for being the reason she got sick and has a failing business. she targets all my interests ad friends and pushes them away icant take it anymore please for the love of got help i feel like I'm rotting from the inside out... I DONT KNOW WHO I AM I DONT KNOW WHAT I LIKE ANYMORE, I CAN NEVER MAKE A DECISION WITHOUT ASKING "WHAT WOULD MOM WANT" PLEASE IM NOT EVEN MY OWN PERSON AMYORE, JUST SOMEONE WHO DOES STUFF FOR MOM......WHAT DO I LIKE???WHY CANT I REMEMBER
I’m so sorry to hear your mother’s behavior is making you question your own identity, as well as whether or not you’re responsible for completely unrelated bad things that happen to her. You are by no means responsible for her health issues and struggling business. It can be very painful and isolating to have your interests and decisions invalidated by someone close to you. It sounds like your mother may have difficulty keeping boundaries between her own desires and beliefs and your normal need for an independent social life and interests. As a result you end up losing your sense of who you are, which seems like it could be really scary! Despite your mother’s behavior, you are the best expert on what you like and what you want. We all have different ‘parts’ to ourselves, and it could be helpful to differentiate the part of you that wants to please your mother from the deeper and more authentic part that can follow its intuition. For example, in your decision-making process when you ask yourself what your mother wants, you can also consider what you would want if your mother had no involvement in the situation. If you feel comfortable enough, it might be helpful to begin a journal to express yourself and have a safe place to explore your true thoughts and feelings. While you might not be able to control what your mother wants, you can absolutely honor and validate your own interests and values. Please feel free to contact us at 888-222-2228 via call or text if you’d like more support with this. Thank you for contacting 2NDFLOOR Youth Helpline!
DUHFUH :(((( i'm really sorry my dude I bet its very scary for you and I'm sure it must be absolutely horrifying to even forget who you are. I wanna be here to encourage you that you can get through this. No matter what happens I wanna let you know that I'm here to cheer you on and hope that you can make it through. You got this my dude you are you and I know you can make it through. I also wanna tell you that as long as you don't hurt anyone with it you should be free to do your hobbies and interest and to make friends who help you and make you feel happy. I bet it's so hard to have that lingering thought when you make a decision and I'm sure it must be scary to not remember who you are. As someone who personally struggles with remembering her childhood and her past I don't have a full picture because I can never be in your shoes truly but I have an idea of how scary and frustrating it can be not to even remember your parts of you that you should remember. But it's ok, eventually I'm sure they'll come to you if you give it time. They have for me and I know they can for you, you can do this my dude I'll be cheering you on <3
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DISCLAIMER: 2NDFLOOR is a youth helpline designed to listen, help and guide youth in addressing challenges. Periodically, calls may be monitored for quality assurance and training purposes. You are assured anonymity and confidentiality, except in life-threatening situations. When receiving such an emergency phone call, 2NDFLOOR staff is required by law to report hurting yourself/others or abuse to the appropriate authorities. If you or someone you know is struggling or having thoughts of suicide, call 988 or chat at 988lifeline.org. In life-threatening situations, call 911.
