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Background Story: My reading class in middle school is reading about Roll of Thunder, Hear My Cry. It's about the the Great Depression, racism, and segregation. This book has the "n" word in it nd I'm the only black person in that class. Yes, I've talked to my reading teacher and she said that she won't say the word. But, it still makes me uncomfortable .
The Actual Story: After I finished the last pages of the chapter, I went to the bathroom. When I came back to the classroom, a boy ( he was white) he whispered something. At first, I went back to my seat and thought nothing of it. But after thinking about, I thought he said the n word to me. But, I was 50% sure and 50% not sure if he actually said it to me. Then, after school, I went home to tell my mom about and she said that I really can't do anything since I wasn't so sure if he actually said it or not. Please give me some advice.
. Thank you.
I do understand why that whole situation in general would make you feel uncomfortable. I have to say that your mom is right because you are not 100% sure that is what he actually said.
Now let's look at it this way. Let's just say for argument's sake this boy definitely said that word. Who looks worse?...him for saying it or you for receiving the comment? Definitely him- and it shows who he may be as a person which is not good for him and his mindset. You don't look like the bad person, he does. He's the one with the problems inside his own mind with having a thought like that and expressing a thought like that.
Now back to the reality of the situation...it's 50/50 which means that we are only in a "what if" situation...which means you should not waste any more of your time thinking about this. I would say moving forward, maybe just be more mindful and if anything else happens along those lines that you become sure of then a different conversation needs to happen.
Remember, don't let something that you are unsure of bring you down! If this continues to pop into your head push the thought out with things that make you feel good about yourself and happy. That's what you deserve. Also, keep in mind resiliency is key. Unfortunately, in life you will surely come across mean, disrespectful, ignorant people. You can't ever control their thoughts and actions, only your own. Building up your resiliency to adverse situations will help keep you positive, peaceful, and healthy throughout life.
If you would like to talk about this further or anything else in the future you can call us at the 2NDFLOOR Youth Helpline. We are here 24/7 at 888-222-2228. I hope this helped!
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