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So, there's this girl in my school and me and her used to be really close. REALLY CLOSE. And like, she just started drifting away from me. I understand that it's normal for friendships to end and new friendships to start because I've gone through that a lot. But this time it was different. She didn't leave me because I just wasn't the friend she was looking for, she left because I didn't wear or act the way the girls in my grade did. That lowkey kinda hurt. Then, I got mad and told my friends not be friends with her. But I got too guilty and just told everyone else that she was fine. Then, she sent me an apology letter over Gmail. Since, I felt guilty, I returned it with another letter about me telling my friends. The conversation continued but as I started getting casual and saying words like, Bro or kalm for fun, she replied with, "That's not how to reply to a apology letter." Well, fast-forward and it's in the middle of the year when she spreads a rumor that I was calling her and her friends names. She posted it as her snapcchat story. Naturally, I was very upset. Espcially when she said she was going to confront me. (That didn't happen) But eventually my classmates found out and now like, half the grade dosen't like me for a thing I didn't do! What should I do?!
Sorry this is happening to you. Sounds like you tried doing the right thing and it just went sideways when she thought you weren't appropriately responding to her email. Spreading rumors is never alright though. You could talk to her if you are still on somewhat of speaking terms and ask why she is doing this and let her know that it's not ok. If that's not an option, take a screen shot of what she's writing about you online and bring it to the school. Every school in NJ has an anti-bullying specialist that you can bring that to and have them address the person doing it. You could also have your parents reach out to the school and inform them about what's going on and see if that has a better response if you going to your teacher doesn't go well. Sorry you are experiencing this and if you want to talk further about this, call or chat with us anytime.
I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through this. Friendship drama, especially when it involves rumors, can be incredibly painful and confusing. Here are some steps you can consider taking to address the situation:
1. Stay Calm and Reflect: First, take a moment to breathe and process your feelings. It’s understandable to feel hurt and upset, but staying calm will help you think more clearly about how to handle the situation.
2. Clarify the Rumor: If you feel comfortable, consider addressing the rumor directly with your classmates. You could say something like, "I heard there's a rumor going around about me calling [her name] names, but that's not true. If you have any questions, feel free to ask me."
3. Talk to Your Friend: If you feel up to it, you might want to reach out to the girl who started the rumor. Express how her actions affected you and clarify the misunderstanding. Keep the conversation focused on how you feel rather than placing blame.
4. Focus on Your Support System: Lean on your other friends during this time. Surrounding yourself with supportive people can help you feel less isolated and remind you that you have people who care about you.
5. Stay True to Yourself: Remember that you don’t need to change who you are to fit in with others. Authenticity is important in friendships, and those who truly care about you will appreciate you for who you are.
6. Avoid Gossip: Try not to engage in gossip or talk negatively about her or the situation with others. This can help you maintain your integrity and avoid escalating the conflict further.
7. Consider Moving Forward: If the situation becomes too toxic or if the friendship doesn’t seem worth the hassle, it might be best to focus on building new friendships with those who appreciate you for who you are.
8. Seek Guidance: If the situation escalates or continues to impact your mental health, consider talking to a trusted adult or counselor at school. They can provide support and guidance on how to navigate these social dynamics.
Remember, it’s tough now, but this situation can improve over time. Stay true to yourself, and focus on the friendships that uplift you. You deserve to be treated with respect and kindness.
This is a safe space to share what's on your mind and to get support from real people.
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