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To start off, my friend set me up with another friend of hers. After hearing her rave about me, he asked her for my number and we started texting... ALOT. Apparently he was super nervous to text me, since he has never really "talked" to a girl before. My friend told me that he is quite shy, but I did not expect him to be so talkative over text. Prior to this, I have never met him and I did not even know what he looked like so I was quite skeptical, but I trusted my friend and I decided to give it a shot. Eventually he asked to hangout so we could meet in person. I agreed and invited him over to my house and we had a really great time. He was originally supposed to leave my house earlier but he decided to stay longer then he had anticipated. As he left he said "I hope I wasn't a disappointment". He did not seem shy at all and he was super easy to talk to- I was not disappointed whatsoever. But after that day everything sort of changed. He stopped texting me as much as he did before, and started to give me bland answers that gave me barely anything to bounce off on. He stopped texting me good morning texts and talking to me first thing in the morning and last thing at night. I automatically assumed that he was not interested after meeting me, but I was confused since he had wanted to stay over longer then he first said. Once in a while he would text me first and eventually he asked me to hangout with him again. I felt relieved knowing that he was still interested in getting to know me and I was very excited. Although I know he enjoyed spending time with me and wants to hangout again, i'm still confused why he hasn't been talking to me much anymore. I get that he is busy and has a life, and I don't expect him to be on his phone 24/7, but it just confuses me how he can go from texting me 24/7 when we didn't know each other to barely talking at all now that we have met. I have all of this reassurance that he is still interested, but why do I feel like he is just leading me on? He has never had a girlfriend before so maybe it could just be that he doesn't know what to do? Am I just overreacting? I am very interested in getting to know him better, and I don't want to sound too clingy or controlling.
Thank you for helping out :)
It's very difficult for us to guess why another person is acting or doing something, because there can be many reasons. It could be as simple as not having as much time now as he did before, to maybe feeling like he's bothering you to something happened when you met that made him feel like he needed to back off and anything in between. The only person that truly can answer that question is him. If you're not comfortable asking him in person, maybe you can text him about it. Maybe even asking in a joking type of way like "I miss your good morning texts" with an appropriate emoji face would give you the answer you're looking for. If you're really brave, ask him about it when you hang out together next time and see how he responds. It could also be as you pointed out, a lack of experience with relationships. In any case, if it's something that's bothering you, try asking him about it and hopefully he'll be straight with you and give you an answer so you can stop wondering. Call or text us anytime at 888-222-2228.
This is a safe space to share what's on your mind and to get support from real people.
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