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What do I do?

Hi, I'm new to this website and I just really really need an answer, a sign of some sort for this situation.

It was May when we started dating. I knew the way we started had been odd and a huge red flag for me but I kept my rose colored glasses on. I was 13 by now, my birthday was April. Sometimes things got very sexual through text and I thought maybe this was normal.

Then it got worse. June came along and I believe the weekend before, we had been on call. They were being sexual, I ignored it and just joked around. Then they asked "Haha what if we had just touched each other in a bathroom, if so what would you like me to touch?" I so desperately wish I had wished it had been a joke, something else. I perceived it as a joke and answered.

Then June 13th, 2022 comes along. 7th grade was ending. They had to have a friend with us when hanging out with me because they thought it was bright to tell their parents I was a biological dude who likes dudes. Thanks to their big brain, I had to have someone third wheel and I felt so bad for them. They decided to ditch this person, running into the public library and hiding in the quiet rooms, a corner where mainly students want to get work done. We were doing homework and they asked for a few kisses, I was hesitant cause I really just wanted to finish homework, get a drink, cause I was thirsty, and go home. I gave them the kisses and when we finished, we decided to go to the nearby boba shop for a drink to share.

While walking they brought up the conversation we had prior to that day and I hadn't been paying attention, updating my friend where we were going. Once I sat down, they told me they'll be in the bathroom after ordering the drink. I glanced at them ordering the drink then back at my phone, uncomfortable already with the situation. Then I get a text from them to come into the bathroom and I got up and went in, expecting them to tell me something in private. They ended up saying they were serious about it but I didn't deny the touch. I was terrified to say no or say something, I felt stiff. They touched my hips, kissing me and then going behind to lift my dress and look at my backside. I hated it. After a few minutes they left and then texted me to count to 30 before leaving. I remember wanting to cry, my hands trembling as I tried to wash my face and hands, wanting to get them off of my skin. They noticed I left the bathroom too quickly and scolded me quietly. We then left together and I remembered them mentioning that it was cute how I jumped when they lifted my dress up a little.

I don't remember much afterwards but we continued dating until all the sexual comments felt unbearable. Then things started to come back to me and I realized some of the things they did weren't right. I tried explaining to my friends but my friends claimed they don't want to get involved with it, still staying friends with them. I didn't tell them until the first day of 8th grade rolls around and I ended up back at the same boba shop with my friends cause they wanted a drink. I was visibly uncomfortable then I explained what had occurred here the last time I went and they simply said, "Well ____ is still my friend." It made me really pull away from these people.

I ended up telling my brother and my mother because I just felt so terrified of them. I felt like ditching schoola few times. The counselor had told me "well you still said yes and they weren't agressive" and just sent me back to class. I remember telling a friend I thought had my back that I was going to the counselor and she freaked out on me, begging me not to. It's like I've been watered down ever since the realization, ever since I lost all my friends, mainly due to this. What should I do? I don't want to talk to that person face to face at all, I don't wanna be bullied by their friends cause they got in trouble for it. I know I said this already but can someone please help?

2NDFLOOR

Thank you for contacting us and sharing your story. Your feelings are completely understandable. Since you have many different points to share it could be easier to communicate about this by calling or texting our helpline. I am unsure of exactly which part you would like further guidance with since you have told your family and a school counselor. Are these friends that you still want to be friends with? If you are worried about being bullied that is something that must be reported to the school if it happens. It also seems like at your age your friends may not have the best perspective about this or even a mature understanding about it. Did your family and the counselor make you feel like your feelings were validated and did your mom, especially, offer advice? If you feel comfortable please reach out to discuss this further at 888-222-2228.




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