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Dating
I’m 18 now and unfortunately i’ve never been in a relationship or even had my first kiss. i’ve been on a couple dates when i was younger and this year i have been on dating apps for a few months, but it always leads to nothing and I can’t help but think how much i’m falling behind. it sucks because i’m so depressed i’m afraid to ask anybody out even if i want to but then this means i never get the chance to start a relationship. this is all very triggering for me and my eating disorder. i know this isn’t true but i can’t help but think that i must be the ugliest person in the world and that’s why nobody is ever interested and then i just stop eating or end up binging. sometimes i just wish i had somebody to comfort me/cuddle with and someone i could share my feelings with. i genuinely have no clue what to do from here as all dating prospects seem pretty grim. how am i supposed to get someone to like me when i dont even like myself?
Dating can present various challenges, and it is common for individuals to encounter difficulties along the way. Not everyone finds the dating process straightforward, and experiencing setbacks is a natural part of the journey.
Emphasize your personal development by viewing dating experiences as valuable lessons that help you understand yourself better and clarify what you seek in a partner.
It is important to remember that your self-worth is not contingent upon your relationship status. When dating does not seem to be going well, it can adversely impact your overall confidence and self-esteem. Engage in activities that enhance your self-image, such as exercising, pursuing hobbies, maintaining a healthy diet, and spending time with encouraging friends.
Recognize and confront negative self-talk by substituting it with positive affirmations. Acknowledge that dating requires time and effort, and avoid placing excessive pressure on yourself to find the "ideal" partner right away.
If your dating challenges are significantly affecting your mental well-being, it may be beneficial to seek therapy to explore underlying issues related to self-esteem.
It's really tough to feel the way you do right now, and I want you to know that your feelings are valid. Many people experience similar thoughts and emotions, especially when it comes to dating and self-esteem. It's important to remember that relationships take time and that everyone’s journey is different. Just because you haven't had a relationship yet doesn't mean you're falling behind—there's no set timeline for these experiences.
It’s understandable to feel anxious about dating, especially if you’re dealing with depression and an eating disorder. These feelings can create a cycle that makes it harder to reach out to others. Remember that it's okay to take things at your own pace. Building a connection with someone often starts with feeling comfortable in your own skin, and that can take time and self-compassion.
Consider focusing on small steps that can help you feel better about yourself. This could be practicing self-care, engaging in hobbies that bring you joy, or even seeking support from a therapist or counselor who can help you navigate these emotions. They can provide a safe space for you to express your feelings and help you develop coping strategies.
It’s also perfectly okay to express your desire for companionship and intimacy. Many people crave connection, and reaching out for comfort and support is a sign of strength. You deserve to feel loved and supported, and that often starts with being kind to yourself.
When you feel ready, try to connect with others in low-pressure environments, like clubs, classes, or social gatherings where you can meet people with similar interests. Building friendships can sometimes lead to deeper connections without the immediate pressure of dating.
You are not alone in this, and it’s important to remember that you are deserving of love and kindness, both from yourself and others. Take your time, be gentle with yourself, and know that your journey is uniquely yours. You’re doing the best you can, and that’s enough. Reach out for support when you need it, and keep holding onto hope. You are worthy of love and connection.
This is a safe space to share what's on your mind and to get support from real people.
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